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Confessions of a Procrastinating Adoptive Dad Wannabe: 12 Lessons I Learned in the Last Few Months

Confessions of a Procrastinating Adoptive Dad WannabeI have a confession to make.

It’s been almost a year and a half now since my wife and I started our adoption journey. Back when we first talked with our adoption attorney around January 2013, we set a goal that we would have a baby by that Christmas. We knew this was an ambitious goal and there was no guarantee that it would happen that fast, but that was what we strove for at the time.

Now here we are, halfway through 2014, and we are still trying to finish up the home study.

What happened?

In short, life happened. Things got crazy. We got busy and started to lose sight of our priorities. We ended up putting the adoption on hold for a while as we focused on other things. Even this blog got put on hiatus for a few months.

It all started last fall when we decided to move into a new house. There were several reasons behind our decision, but mainly we decided we needed a little more room, especially with the prospect of a baby on the way.

Moving in and of itself is always stressful, but on top of that, things were getting miserable at my job, so much so that it became necessary for me to leave. I was able to find a new job that paid a little less but was much less stressful. I’m much happier at this new job, but it was still a big adjustment for me at first.

There were other things that happened in our lives that I won’t go into detail about, but the bottom line is that things got overwhelming for a while. As a result, we stopped focusing on getting our home study done while trying to tend to all these other things. We also suffered a setback when we found out that some of our paperwork for the home study had been lost and we had to re-do some of it. This meant more waiting, more frustration.

However, I can’t make too many excuses for the slow pace of our home study. I will admit that a lot of it is our fault. My wife and I have a terrible tendency to procrastinate, especially when it comes time to the parts of the adoption process that aren’t “fun.” For example, it took me forever to go to the doctor’s office for the required physical because I hate going to the doctor. Nonetheless, it’s one of those things that needs to be done, like it or not, if you want to adopt.

Thankfully, we are almost done with the home study as I write this, and should have it wrapped up in the next week. I will have a full update when it is done.

I don’t know if any of you have experienced something similar in your adoption, where things went much slower than you expected due to life getting in the way or you losing focus. If so, know that you are not alone. I’ve learned quite a few lessons over the last few months, and I thought I would share 12 of them here in the hopes that they might help you out as well.

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